Daily Archives: 06/19/2011

“F” in Stress

Lately, I had a newfound interest in reading and writing, (perhaps on anything), a while ago I just finished reading an article all about stress and thought that some information could be of any use to others specially those like me, who had made an unwritten pact between stress itself.

Stress, is perhaps one of the most widespread and popular word in the town. In a fast paced busy world we have, avoiding being in such state is nearly impossible. But in fairness to one of the most unwanted mental/emotional strain known to man, the term stress is often used or regarded as in a wrong way. Stress is often related to any strain, worry, tension or difficulty we have, but then, at some point that may not really be the case. We may be suffering from a different suspect: depression, disappointment etc. which is far from being “stress”.

Fight – one of the three “F” options for managing stress (the other being flee and flow) is the most destructive. You win by punches, but you inflict psychological wounds on someone. Flee takes you nowhere. Flow is the best.

Whatever you resist, persists, or as they say – “pag pinigil, lalong manggigigil”. Why is that you can choose your friends but not your family? You can have your “dream guy or girl” but then you can’t force him or her to like you as well. Same banana.

Relationships – that’s the heart of EQ. The test is when you’re in conflict, and it will always happen. And when it comes, it won’t hurt to swallow your pride once in a while. It’s not fattening anyway. Self-confidence is good but healthy self-esteem is better. Second, consider anyone innocent until proven guilty, withhold any judgments on someone until things are absolutely clear. Never assume nor guess.

These two actions: humility and open-mindedness-cure the two causes of conflict, pride and prejudice. They make you “flow” and it makes life a little less complicated.

Pain is an event, suffering is a choice. You can’t change people but you can change yourself. Your constructive energy influences others, and can miraculously change them on their own.

And life is a relationship. Let’s not push. Don’t hit with fatal mistakes. Dance with the music. Don’t fight, don’t flee, just flow.

 

That’s the manliest thing you can do.

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ADSpiration: Mini Cooper Installation

This is what you call a car pool

This is a creative ad by Mini Cooper placed at the Zurich, Switzerland train station. It gives the perception that the Mini Cooper just fits for anyone, everyone.


“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”

Life is not all about the big payday (omit the word big if you’re not that lucky enough to find a good paying job – at least you have one right?) NOT ALL ABOUT what we gain either, but it also has something to do with what we make out of it.

There’s a much better personal feeling of success in giving. A fulfilling life can never be achieved alone.

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” – Winston Churchill


One for the Stressed

Getting criticized your supervisor; finding out that someone you love has lied to you; receiving some bad news — these things cause stress. And stress has negative consequences, as you well know. But these are only stressful events. The source of stress that wreaks the greatest havoc on your health and sanity is ongoing stressful circumstances.

But there is something you can do about it. When you have an ongoing stressful circumstance in your life, you can modify your level of responsibility. Either take more responsibility or less. Start by asking yourself, “Am I trying to control something I can’t or shouldn’t control?” or “Is there something I should take responsibility for that I have been leaving out of my control?”

It might help to write it out. Write the questions and then jot down some ideas — where are you taking too much or too little control of some aspect of your life?

If something is out of your control (or is none of your business and you’ve been trying to make it your business), you will relieve yourself of a lot of stress by letting go of it. Drop that one. Recognize it’s out of your control and busy yourself with things that are in your control. You may be in the habit of trying to control that thing, so you’ll have to remind yourself again and again for a couple of weeks: “Oh yeah, I’m not trying to control that anymore.” Write it on a card and carry it with you. Post notes to yourself on your bathroom mirror. Do whatever you have to do to remember you no longer have to waste your energy trying to control that thing.

Now, if you find something you should and can control and haven’t been, roll up your sleeves and get to work on solving the problem.Deliberately take steps to repair the troubling circumstances. That’ll relieve your stress better than anything else. It may be difficult at first; it may actually cause you extra stress to face the situation and try to deal with it, but in the long-term, your stress level will go down.

Take responsibility for what you are responsible for, and stop taking responsibility for what is not your responsibility. It’s that simple. Control what you can control, and let the rest go. It will relieve a great deal of your stress. Control stress by stressing control.

Control what is your responsibility.


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